Mission report of the Grand Experiment - by Ksndra


We were tasked to go out in Bone Moon and aid the Wizards Concilium in their experiment that they’d been gathering elementals for to try and re-establish interplanar travel. I was interested in this mission as I was carrying a small elemental trap for them.

Along with myself, Ksndra, Wizard of the Red School, Acolyte of the Dark Seers and generally mischievous, there was:



  • Ichabod – Party Leader, Pacifist and Sorcerer
  • Kylar – High Priest of the Reapers,  Aspirant Fell Knights
  • Dougal and Hamish – Warriors of some sect. Think they’re confused, they do wear skirts
  • Kyle – Ranger, bit of a healer and damage taker of the three K’s
  • Renown – Scouty type Mischief Maker
  • Shade - Warrior and giggler
  • Kortaz – Healer and Hitter of things
  • Master Harlequin – Yellow Sorcerer, Seneschal to the Dreadlord Araikas, really persuasive guy
  • Theron – Druid and Hitter or things with a bow and hider in a busha
  • Gob – Just, Gob.
  • Cerridwyn – Bard and our great healer. Also very giggly. Especially with me.
  • The Dogs – Running dog, Sleeping dog, Lying dog, Fighting Dog and Scorch. Scouts and mischief makers.



On the evening of Earth Day we made our way to the area we were sent to do to meet with the Wizards Concilium we were set upon by a number of Shadowsfall working under Judge Alsos. Now, If not met this guy but if these guys were anything to go buy he seems to be a bit of an arsehole. They were really quite hard.

After them, surprise surprise, we met some, wait for it… Lemonmentals! I mean elementals. Like I hadn’t expected that with what was going on and this fight seemed to give me my roll for the mission… giving out magic blades to those without one. And there were a lot without them.

We then met a bloke called Cobalt who was a wizard of the blue school. Original. Anyway he told us about a hut nearby where we were going to stay coz everywhere else was occupied, directed us to it and said someone would be along shortly to explain more to us.

So off we went and came across some of them melnob people and their hepaths. Such a friendly lot they are. Not.

We saw to them and walked off towards this building which turned out to be bloody trapped. So we sent in scorch. There were a few bangs and screams and then he said it was safe to enter. Now knowing scorch, I had a few misgivings about the safeness he declared. I was later proven to be correct when I walked inside the toilet and found the traps from the building all over the toilets. In the Showers. Under the Seat. On the toilet handle. Everywhere. Never trust a puppy that giggles and keeps asking “Sparky Boom Boom Lady, Do you need the toilet?”

Once inside a Blue Sorcerer from the Wizards Concilium named Leveforte and a member of the Shadowsfall going by the name of Dansin and working for Judge Hawson (he’s the one we get on with) arrived. As Ichabod and I were speaking with them we were beset by Celestial Bureaucracy. Apparently they wanted the ritual stopped so we stopped them.

So what I could decipher from Leveforte and Dansin, there was an awful din going off as we were a large party and the building wasn’t huge, was that they Wizards Concilium were building a huge cannon made of mana and aiming it at the Vanishing Tower, Home to the Melnobs as due to its nature it was the most likely place to shatter the planar barrier and return the possibility of interplanar travel and that hopefully the tower would vanish and reappear some place else. We were to assist in one of the smaller rituals that were taking place, more information would be given on that the following day, that I’d hand over to them my elemental trap and oh that if anything went wrong we were to run. Far and fast apparently. Fills me with such confidence.

So after Leveforte and Dansin departed, Sleeping dog pulled out a pouch of liar dice and we proceeded in a night of drinking, smoking, laughing, playing dice and general frivolity. Turns out Kylars armour and Kylar is quite comfy to fall asleep on. He’s certainly mellowing.

Harlequin also piped up that if anyone wished to pledge themselves to the Dreadlord Araikas they should do so while he was there. I considered this due to the fact I had been planning on doing so, but I wished to speak to the Lady Kevralyn, first about moving from Aether Town to Darkhome before Pledging to the Dreadlord.

Fire D ay

So after some dude whose name I can’t remember from the Wizards Concilium turned up (it was really early and I think id probably only had 1 smoke and 2 cups of tea) and told us where to go and advising us to avoid one certain ritual as it wasn’t meant for us we moved out to find our ritual site and meet with an advisor from the Wizards Concilium.

Along the way we encountered a few waves of elementals, more blades from Kass, some Saldorians and some Dye-fa-dyne who gave us free sweets. Very tasty sweets too.

We arrived at the ritual site and it was overrun with elementals. We dispatched of these but while doing so Cerridwyn vanished.

As we were looking around the ritual site a Wizard by the name Tarquin appeared. He seemed somewhat distressed and unnerved. He explained to us that he’d been attacked by a member of the Green college of the Wizards Concilium and her retinue and tried to destroy his ritual so he vanished himself to save himself. Apparently they had also stolen the ritual focus and we needed to find a new one or get the stolen one back. Apparently there was some discord in the Wizards Concilium about the experiment and this green sorcerer will have hidden themselves effectively. Ichabod and I had a very, very, very long conversation with Tarquin while everyone else milled around and got up to mischief. By the end of it my head was pounding as Tarquin seemed somewhat inept in his skills and knowledge. It appears the only spell he knows how to do is to vanish himself.  He said he’d meet up with us later. Joys.

After he buggered off, Lady Isabella from Fortunes Keep, and our sponsor of this mission happened upon us while travelling with a Hierophant on what I can only surmise as Valley Leader Business (I wasn’t really listening, I know that was bad of me but Sleeping Dog had some kind of wreath on his head to give to the Hierophant which was very odd, and entertaining…) She reiterated what she wished us to do and seemed rather concerned about the disappearance of Cerridwyn and wanted to know what we were going to do about it. Well wait around and wait for her to come back was the only option really.

While we were waiting Shade and Dougal discovered an item that was great fun to throw around and started a fun game with that and Scorch decided that stealing a wizard’s hat is a great game. Now I cannot keep up with him but making him slip left right and center was such fun.

We went off to try n find this green wizard that was causing trouble and found what appeared to be an abandoned ritual. I discovered it was warded and needed to be dispelled. While Ichabod and Harlequin were casting Gob decided to try and walk through the ward and failed. Him, Hamish and Dougal then decided to create a battering ram with Hamish to see if that worked. It didn’t.

When the ward was dispelled several wizards and elementals appeared. The wizardess Alayna seemed to be in charge. One elemental kept freezing a number of us. There was some discussion over whether she was the one behind the attack on Tarquin which she denied and when asked by me about why she was hiding she tried to convince us it was to stop her from being attacked. I wasn’t convinced by her at all. She was properly giving us some bullpoop, but I kept getting frozen so I couldn’t speak but I don’t think Ichabod would have listened. We left them and they went back behind their wards. Should have jus started a fight really. We’d have had ‘em.

Suddenly Dansin appeared, being chased after by a number of judge Amos’ men. We dispatched of them and headed back to the building we were staying in to wait for Tarquins return.

As we approached there were a lot of elementals around that started attacking us. They succeeded. And it hurt. A lot. Then it went very dark and I woke up inside the building and wasn’t where I was when it all went dark. Think Ichabod had the same thing.

Once we had lunch we were sat around in the building when I discovered one of the traps that scorch hadn’t disabled or removed. The little shit.

I went to the loo and discovered a blue elemental in the clearing infront of the building. It didn’t seem aggressive and appeared to be beckoning us over to it. After everyone gathered up we went out to see what he wanted and discovered an elemental prince at the bottom of a hill. Turns out he didn’t like casters so we stayed at the top and Renown and Kylar went down to speak to him.

I don’t know what he wanted. I stayed away. Anyone wanting to know are better off asking Hamish, Dougal, Kylar or Renown. Or ask all 4 and try and piece it together from that.

As the party were talking to him they were beset by mist-touched hordlings and the prince went off. I stayed at the top of the hill. I wasn’t going down there till I knew what was going off.

After they were dispatched we found out we were moving out towards the ritual. Not sure why but we were. After some of us attentively making our way down the hill (I had help from Renown who is very sprightly on his feet, but not as sprightly as Dougal. He ran all the way down it and didn’t slip once!) we ran into a number of  Hepaths. After a tough fight with them Tarquin appeared with a new focus for us. I gave it to Ichabod and then Tarquin produced another for me to carry. Sigh. I went off and Identified them and saw some very weird things.

As we made our way we ran into some more Celestial Bureaucracy. This time there was a bloke called Ling Po and he had some war golems with him that shade dispatched of. Didn’t really see much of that as I was dealing with Kylar after one of the CB got a little too keen and tried to take his throat out.

After them, more Shadowsfall after Kylar and Harlequin appeared but they didn’t succeed in taking any spirit strength from either of them.

We made our way to the ritual site and had what was needed to be done explained to us. It appeared that my identifying of the focuses had tampered with one and I’d lost a lot of mana to it. It had effectively absorbed it from me.

We attuned everyone to the ritual and started it. As it took place we were beset by Saldorians, more Celestial Bureaucracy, elementals and other things.

As it approached its end all my, Ichabod’s and Harlequin’s mana was absorbed by the ritual and several magic effects exploded at once.

As far as we were concerned our part in the experiment was finished and our liaison from the Wizards Concilium went off to find out how the other ritual sites faired and would return to us later. We returned to the building.

During dinner, Harlequin put forward his offer about pledging again and this time I took him up on it. Apparently Lady Kevralyn had impressed on him that due to her not being with us he should impart to me that she wished to invite me to reside in Darkhome and to carry on what we had started. I also pledged myself to the Dreadlord Araikas as did Gob.

Shortly after, he returned and said that things had gone awry and asked us to go and investigate a site nearby as he had to go and see other rituals he hadn’t gotten around to.  And that around 3,298 innocents had perished. Oops. Though Kylar then wanted to know just exactly how many of those he could claim as his own.

As we approached where he pointed us to there was a lot of smoke and flashing lights and a slightly crazy man. Think he may have been a mist shaman or something. He explained that a window off plane had been opened but to use it you had to have a key and key pad effectively. He said he had created one for us but we had to find the missing disks. He said he could send us off plane to find them and then wed have to use the keypad to get back. We all had to give our names and walk up a light path. When we got back we had to give him something and if it worth enough we’d be let through. Some of us gave him something physical, other such as myself gave him words. But personal words.

We all passed through and found ourselves on an unknown plane. The first thing we found ourselves faced with was some unknown howling. I thought it was our dogs but they were with us. They went off to investigate and soon it became apparent that they weren’t friendly and attacked us. We killed them and made our way forward. We then came upon what appeared to be some undead. Apparently they couldn’t be killed in the night. We found a hut to sleep in and bedded down for the night.

Steel Day

We woke up and while a group of us were outside having our morning smokes some random people came up on us. They started to attack us shouting some random stuff at us and we tried to keep one to interrogate but someone got a bit over enthusiastic and jobbed him.

Then more people that weren’t threatening appear saying they wanted breakfast and told us we were odd and kept asking if we’d been to something called a “Fancy Dress Party”. Had no idea what they were on about but they told us we were somewhere called the Wytchwood. They also gave us a “wanted poster” for some dude that kept stabbing people and said there would be a reward if we found him and turned him in.

We ventured out to find out what the hell was going on and came upon a building with a group of people inside. They said they were adventurers of the proctorate or something and all seemed to be of a goodly persuasion except maybe one or two who seemed to be trying to hide it.

And they had a goblin! He was so cute! Also the bloke whose etching was on this wanted poster was there and we let him know he was on it. He didn’t seem surprised to be honest but said it was all a big mistake.

Anyway they told us they were after some things from some people and they had one of the keys we needed to activate the gate we had come through. We agreed that if we found some of the stuff they needed we give it them and vice versa.

We got the token off them and they wondered off to do their stuff we got Kylar to commune with the key while we raided their base and ate all their Tea cakes. Do they not know you don’t leave tasty stuff lying around!

Well we discovered that the key was what we were looking for and went off in search of more.

We came across some random people down a massive hill and by the time I got there they had mostly been dispatched of.

Then Renown did two things. First off, he found my gloves I’d lost the previous night after travelling to this stupid plane, and then he found a dead mouse and put it in my hood!!!!!! WHY DO PEOPLE PICK ON ME WITH DEAD ANIMALS!!!!!

Anyway, my memories get a little hazy after that. Did not have anything to do with the fact this was around 10am and somehow some beer had found its way into my system…

We came upon some goodly thing that refused to talk to us while myself and Kylar were around. Have no idea why. Seemed a bit mean to me. Hehe

Anyway when the rest had dealt with him we got what we needed and then myself and Kylar felt pulled towards a small group of buildings. When we got there, there was a small boy who was looking for his father. I felt sorry for this little boy and wanted to look after him but everyone kept telling me it was a bad idea and then Hamish and Dougal fell over and the rest decided I really should be near him and made him stand and face the wall. Poor child. Well Kylar decided he hadn’t used enough power yet today and against my protests attacked the small child and loads of people appeared. Okay it turns out everyone else was right and I just got maternal. Well then I decided I really didn’t like the small child any more as I came over really poorly and kept throwing up everywhere. Thankfully Kortaz saved me with some drink out of his random cup.

Turns out this small child had a key we needed. Who knew!

We carried on our merry way and fought some undead. Well I ran away a lot. And stopped them from taking random weapons, which they seemed intent on doing. We were sat down resting our laurels, having a chat when all of a sudden something happened to Kylar and Harlequin. They went berserk and started attacking us! But something seemed a bit off, as well Kylar seemed to forget everything he can do and Harlequin seemed to just like hitting people with his big staff and laughing a lot more than he does usually. Kylar decided to put his sword on the ground so me and scorch procured it and then he just ambled around till they seemed to come to their senses which, as usual, ended up in an argument between Kylar and I over what was going on and why I, once again, had his bloody huge sword!

Turned out that what we had been fighting had been some kind of spiritual version of them while they were off finding a few more keys for the gate.

We headed back to base for a bite to eat and refreshments having a few more scraps along the way, I think. We met this guy with some random minions that jus wanted to chat but he bored me so I kinda didn’t pay attention.

He wandered off and we headed over to the buildings with a few of us rather needing to use the facilities. However when we got there, there was some random crazy guy in there shouting random things!

I finally went about my business and joined the rest of the group outside who were talking to him. He was spouting something about having lost a finger or a snake or something and that he wanted it back. Then something very funny started happening. Suddenly I distrusted all my party members except Kylar and needed to get to him to be safe.

The next 15 or 20 minutes are a very large blur but apparently from what I can gather from others was that Id made Hamish scared of me and kept shouting at everyone saying to get away from me or they’ll kill me and telling Kylar to kill everyone but us.

I also found out that Gob and Kortaz had had a spat and Kortaz had killed Gob!!! AND Kylar had apparently attacked Cerridywn shouting simlar things to myself.

Once we had ensured we were all back to ourselves, except Gob who just kept wanting to fight people and we had to confiscate every weapon he managed to get his hands on, we went to speak with these people that had appeared down the glade. As we walked over the Crazy Man crept up behind us AND SLIT MY THROAT!!! HOW DARE HE!! I was NOT happy!

When we found of what was going off, it turned out this bloke and his minions had what the crazy man was looking for and would trade it us for as many apples as there was people in his group. So we sent Kortaz to go fetch them from the base and got the finger/snake thing from them and gave it to the Crazy Man and he buggered off leaving us with a few more keys.

We did a few more things and then went off to find the remaining few.

We got split up into two groups, The dogs going off to find out what was going off with a few bears and the rest of us to go find some random head hurting people.

We got to a bridge and were asked to declare ourselves. Some of us were allowed to pass over the bridge and the rest had to remain behind. Myself, Kylar, Renown, Kyle and Kortaz all had to stay behind and we came across the group we met earlier.

They were being followed by some beings in white and explained to us that they needed something off them but as all but one of their party were goodly aligned they lacked the back bone to attack them. We got in a conversation with the party and I decided their goblin was awesome and wanted him to come back with us and join the Valley and meet the rest of our goblins. I think Kakarot, Spingle and Noggin would have loved him! Plus he was a healer and very enthusiastic as it turned out.

We spoke to the people in white, and they turned out to be a group of High Priests of the Good Sphere but Really rude and were really annoying me. So I may have slightly encouraged  Kylar to attack them and Myself and Renown waded in too. Their goblin Hospitlar kept healing us like crazy and really enforced by want to bring him back with us. Anyway Kyle and Kortaz grassed us up to Ichabod when he returned from over the bridge and he told us off and made us go back to base. Kill joy.

Anyway back at base it appeared we had all the keys needed and were met by someone who said he could open a portal to near by the mystic gate to allow us to return to Orin Rakatha.

As we were talking a bunch of Hepaths and Melnobs appeared. How the HELL did they get to Wytchywood? One of them, a hepath, spoke to Kyle and informed him he wanted to speak to the “Little Fire Bug”. Now, Knowing that that was what the Hepath from a few moons ago called me and from the dream I’d had a few nights before from said Hepath, I was not going to get into a conversation with him! We dispatched them swiftly and moved through the portal.

As we headed back to the gate, the forest seemed to set upon us, trying to prevent us from leaving the area. We were beset by wolves and other creatures and several people became enamoured with trees. Theron, however, who had the key (we though that seeing as he can hide easily and at night isn’t very useful as he cant use his bow he would be the best person to carry it}, decided to turn against us for some reason and managed to procure a sword and started to swing it around crazily. I decided the best course of action would be to scare him so much that he ran away. It seems I did such a good job that it took nearly half a passing of an hour to find him after we dealt with all the creatures coming our way.

We managed to get to the portal and put in the correct code while being aided by the crazy mist shaman. We passed through and returned to Orin Rakatha with the crazy mist shaman guy still with us. He didn’t seem to have a grasp on much, especially as he was adamant Kylar and I had caused the cataclysm which hasn’t happened yet.  

We got back to our original base and were attended by Lady Isabella informing us that our mission, while slightly gone awry, had been a success and wished to find out what had happened while we had “disappeared”. We explained to her what had happened and what we had gained.

We decided that the key would be known as Ichabods box and we would work with the wizards concillium to ensure all codes to other planes are discovered and to ensure we had fair use to it, seeing as it was us that retrieved it not the wizards concillium!

We were still battling with our consciences as to the deaths of the innocents and the fact we’ve kind of, well, destroyed an entire tower.

Oops. Well we are certainly expecting some come back from this and we NEED to ensure that the key does NOT fall into the wrong hands! Regardless of those hands being within the tower or from an outside influence!

Oh also something I forgot, when we came back through the gate we received a note. Something about some valley members being stuck on another plane and needing rescuing. I'm not quite sure if they were on murandir or thurandul. They were both mentioned. Im sure it will reach the relevant people and be dealt with.

By my hand

Ksndra – Wizzardess of the Red School, Resident of Darkhome, Acolyte of the Dark Seers

Last Updated on Saturday, 20 September 2014 09:46